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5 Tips To Fully Embrace Intense Emotions Without Self Combusting

We are finally out of Mercury Retrograde as of this past Saturday, the Water Trine that brought some of us into hyper-sensitivity has come and gone; and now, with yesterday giving us our third Supermoon this year, and entering the Grand Sextile next Monday, we have been given many planetary alignments to allow certain emotions to surface, for us to become triggered, as we are further challenged to deal with our inner demons for the purpose of transforming and releasing ourselves into the grandest, most prolific selves we can be!

Coincidentally (or perhaps, not so much), I have recently noticed that many of my patients have been trying hard to fight these emerging emotions, trying to stuff them down since they oftentimes feel most unpleasant.  This method of dealing with emotions can work temporarily.  On the longer term, however, it disconnects us greatly from our authentic selves, and our emotions, that not only do we become out of touch with them; but, because we’ve negated what our Heart has been telling us for so long, we succumb to even deeper fear of what we don’t want to feel.  We then become disconnected from our Hearts, which, in Traditional Chinese Medicine, creates an imbalance towards our connection to self and others.  This culminates in an inability to be in touch with ourselves/others, express genuinely and with love, and can culminate in Heart Yin & Blood Deficiency symptoms such as:  anxiety, palpitations (especially in the evening), insomnia, dream disturbed sleep, poor memory, getting easily startled, to name a few.  And, when we negate our Hearts long enough, it turns into depression.  Sometimes, symptoms are obvious and make us pay notice.  At other times, we can become so used to living this way, even if it feels unbalanced, because it’s what we’ve done for so long, that it feels “safe”.  And, as unbalanced as it may be, it may be even scarier to break from that knowing, even if we know it could free us!

In addition, Summer is the season of the Heart, and Fire is the element of the Heart!  So paying attention to our Heart’s balance at this time of the year makes perfect sense.

Sometimes, we simply just need the reminder that feeling these emotions will not send us into the dark hole, that black void we may have climbed out of years ago.  And, when that familiar feeling triggers us, we immediately assume that we are once again getting sucked into our previously known darkness.  Not so!  Oftentimes, our revisiting triggers are only there to further strengthen our inner knowledge that we are done with them.  And, if we find there are some residual issues we still haven’t fully addressed, that is our opportunity to do some internal house cleaning, to Swiffer away that residue!  So, although we may fear that this is just the Universe’s cruel joke to suck us back into the previously known black hole we thought we’d successfully dealt with in the past; this serves, in fact, as a glorious recognition for us to claim our power even further, and is a tool to confirm that within ourselves.

So, when you are emotionally triggered (and who hasn’t been in the past couple of weeks?), and think your emotions are such that you feel you just may self combust from the turmoil of it all, keep these tips in mind:

  1. You are exactly where you need to be right now.  It may not feel like it, but the Universe has conspired with your Higher Self to give you exactly what you need.  So, even if it doesn’t feel like it at this very moment, you are being held, and your Highest Good is in the works.  So, trust your Higher Self, trust that everything is as it should be.
  2. Unless you are 6 feet under already, you will not self combust.  We are not in an episode of “Fringe”, here, people!  I know your inner Drama Queen feels you will surely die with all the pain you are experiencing now, but what will make it worse is if you negate your feelings, which will only amplify them.  So…
  3. Allow your feelings to surface, eventually they will pass.  Yes, that means no mental martial arts on putting a beat down to all of those unpleasant feelings!  Feel it – the rage, the anger, the disappointment, the hurt, the betrayal, the shock, the fear, all of it.  If you indulge these feelings long enough (as in being with them, not diverting them into a night-long binge of extracurricular naughtiness), instead of fighting them, they will be just like a small child having a tantrum – eventually, they will exhaust themselves, and the feeling of crisis will pass.
  4. Give yourself some love.  When you give yourself healthy attention (eating well, surrounding yourself with positive people, doing activities that bring you joy, etc.), your Heart connects with you again, and you remember how joy feels.  One way to give yourself some love is to literally envision the Younger Version Of You, the one who’s experiencing the tantrum.  I bring this image to mind, because usually, the triggering fear or rage is coming from a place that is old, that came from a time when we were younger and never received the support we needed at the time.  Hence, we’ve reinforced behaviors within ourselves due to triggers in our lives.  Remember what Younger You is wearing, your hairstyle, the surroundings (are you outside, or in a room?).  See her having her tantrum, her outrage.  Hold her with great unconditional love and tell her you love her, honor her, hear her, and believe her.  Tell her all the things you wished you could’ve heard when you first felt that familiar fear, anger, or hurt.  Then, in your mind’s eye, hold her hand, and let her know that she is no longer that disempowered child; that, even with what issues you’re currently working on, you are now an adult who is able to make good decisions and empowered choices.  Heal that bridge with your Younger Self!  This now nurtured relationship will now serve you in the present.
  5. Set the intention that you are firmly seated in your power.  As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, our intentions are so powerful, that we can instantly break destructive patterns by simply setting the intention to do so.  Even if it’s a long term destructive pattern we’ve endured, setting the intention creates a vacuum that the Universe has no choice but to fill, and the shift you’ve created has begun.  It doesn’t matter if you’ve been like this for 1 year or 10 years.  Set the intention that you are receiving support from your Team of Light for guidance and protection in this shift in your journey.  With long-term patterns, it may take longer to get to that place of peace, but once the intention has been set for you to own your power, you have opened that door to owning your light.  The healing has begun.  Too easy to be true?  Healing doesn’t have to be difficult.  It’s all about perception.  Don’t make things harder on yourself, especially when they don’t need to be!

Emotions may be strong, but in the end, only we give them the power to overtake us.

According to the Marriam-Webster Dictionary, “combustion” is:

  1. an act or instance of burning
  2. a usually rapid chemical process (as oxidation) that produces heat and usually light
  3. violent agitation

You have a choice:  to burn up with violent agitation, or to be the chemical process in your mental synapses, emotional intelligence, and Heart strength that produces energy, heat, and light.  Which do you choose?

Igniting your Heart Qi,

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